Browse Tag: laser guns

RECAP: Congo

Congo (1995): Frank Marshall

Diamonds, we are told, are a girl’s best friend. But what if they were also a murderous sub-species of gorilla’s best friend? What if those gorillas were bred by humans to protect central African diamond mines known to an Israelite king thousands of years ago? And what if there was a movie about them, and it also had famed cinematic ham Bruce Campbell in it? Well, you’d have Congo.

ONE SENTENCE PLOT SUMMARY: Two scientists search the depths of the Congolese jungle, one to find a source of diamonds and the other to return home a talking gorilla, while everyone involved meets the world’s most aggressive gorillas. Continue Reading

RECAP: Jupiter Ascending

Jupiter Ascending (2015): The Wachowskis

What happens when two acclaimed directors get a little too much leeway? You get a spectacle like Jupiter Ascending. The Wachowski siblings, creators of The Matrix, got free reign to make this movie, and the result is a confused mess. It has its high points, and its low ones.

ONE SENTENCE PLOT SUMMARY: Born on a container ship, Jupiter Jones ascends to the throne of the most powerful family in universe, the owners of Earth.  Continue Reading

RECAP: Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015): J.J. Abrams 

You waited 30 years for this. You suffered through Episodes I-III. You endured tinkering, re-releases, and Jar Jar.

The guy from LOST and Alias and Star Trek wrested the mantle from George Lucas after the Creator sold his rights to Disney. You were excited and nervous and happy and now you’ve seen it.

It took all of 18 days for Episode VII to earn more money at the US box office than any movie in American history. You liked it.

I have only seen the mainline Star Wars films. I haven’t read the books, watched the cartoons, or memorized Wookiepedia, so when I write things like “We don’t know…” or “No one has seen…”, bear in mind that you might know, because you know everything about the Star Wars galaxy, but I’m only talking about Episodes I-VII.

ONE SENTENCE PLOT SUMMARY: With Luke Skywalker missing, Han Solo and some new friends reluctantly help Leia Organa and other Resistance fighters raze a spherical planet-destroying weapon wielded by the First Order, and if that sounds like a movie you’ve seen before, it’s not, OK? Continue Reading