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RECAP: Jupiter Ascending

Jupiter Ascending (2015): The Wachowskis

What happens when two acclaimed directors get a little too much leeway? You get a spectacle like Jupiter Ascending. The Wachowski siblings, creators of The Matrix, got free reign to make this movie, and the result is a confused mess. It has its high points, and its low ones.

ONE SENTENCE PLOT SUMMARY: Born on a container ship, Jupiter Jones ascends to the throne of the most powerful family in universe, the owners of Earth.  Continue Reading

RECAP: Kingsman: The Golden Circle

Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017): Matthew Vaughn

The surprise action hit of 2014, Kingsman: The Secret Service spawned a sequel from the same director and writers. What if the US had a private secret service? Well, you’re about to find out.

ONE SENTENCE PLOT SUMMARY: An American drug queen pin annihilates the Kingsman, forcing the Brits to join their American counterparts the Statesman.  Continue Reading

RECAP: G.I. Joe Retaliation

G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013): Jon M. Chu

As if gifted to me by the Hollywood gods, the second G.I. Joe movie opened on my birthday. Did I see it on opening day? I did. Did I see it in IMAX? Of course. Did I have a kick-ass time? You betcha.

G.I. Joe is about as silly an idea for a movie franchise as one of enormous alien robots able to disguise themselves as 21st-century Earth technology. Now THAT would be a crazy franchise, and it would probably fail. I’m glad someone gave the Joes a try.

Is there any credit better than “In Association with: HASBRO”?

ONE SENTENCE PLOT SUMMARY: The Joes Retaliate against Cobra Commander and Zartan and…ZEUS?

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